Monday, October 24, 2011

Little MoFo FoMoCup Winners: Byte Marks Racing

Congratulations to the Byte Marks Racing Ford Escort GT for winning the inaugural Little MoFo FoMoCup! Byte Marks finished 19th overall and second in class B, which was by far the best finish for four-cylinder Fords in the whole field. Enjoy your [unfinished] trophy and 12 bottles of loathsome drinkable Schlitz for your efforts!

The origins of this [unofficial] award come from several "Sometimes-I-can't-believe-how-totally-awesome-we-are" conversations between Alan and myself [Eric]. The genesis for this, specifically, was Alan and Eric mirroring Ford engineers of the late 1970s in suggesting that Ford could make a compact car competitive with anything the Japanese could build. Of course, that hasn't parsed out exactly in LeMons (or real life), so they opted to create a separate competition to help Ford Escort team owners feel better about their terrible, terrible car. The original name was proposed as the Escort Cup with the winner getting a repurposed bowling trophy and some nasty beer.

Enter Greg from the Skid Steer Racing Mercury Bobcat team, who sent Eric a message via the LeMons forum to let him know that he was building an actual trophy for the Escort Cup (which only had two known entrants at the time). Since Greg didn't drive an Escort, Eric suggested that the competition be expanded to all small-displacement , normally-aspirated1 ("Little Mofos") Ford Motor Company ("FoMoCo") entries. And so was born the Little MoFo FoMoCup.

Greg brought the unfinished trophy to Autobahn to complete, but some, uh, difficulties arose2 and the trophy was unfinished due to time constraints (It will be mailed shortly, though).

Byte Marks did graciously accept the case of Schlitz, labeled by the Nixon campaign as "Unfit for human consumption," but that was mostly because Byte Marks are a bunch of Commies3.

In any event, here are the full Little MoFo FoMoCup results:

#101 Byte Marks Racing - Ford Escort GT - 351 Laps (19th overall)
#79 Dos Limons - Ford Fiesta - 314 Laps (35th overall)
#29 TSI/LemonSqueezer/Barbie - Mercury Capri - 291 Laps (44th overall)
#78 Dos Limons - Ford Fiesta - 269 Laps (50th overall)
#74 Team Resignation - Ford Escort LX/ZX2 - 246 Laps (57th overall)
#863 Team Skid Steer Bobcat - Mercury Bobcat - 235 Laps* (63rd overall)

* Team Skid Steer ran at least part of one stint with the transponder off. They likely would have finished in fifth place if the laps had counted.

Fastest Laps:

#74 Team Resignation - 1:49.866
#78 Dos Limons - 1:50.705
#79 Dos Limons - 1:51.694
#101 Byte Marks - 1:51.898
#29 TSI/Barbie - 1:52.721
#862 Skid Steer - 2:07.803

Congratulations to all FoMoCo teams for being dumb enough to run Ford metal! Each Ford entry ran more than 500 miles on the track!

We'll hopefully see all of these teams again at next year's Autobahn race(s).

1 Astute car people out there will note that the third-generation Mercury Capri actually runs a turbo 1.6L motor. The car was included as an executive decision by the FoMoCup's [self-appointed] executive directors (Greg and Eric). The normally aspirated tag was designed to keep Turbo Coupes, Turbostangs and the occasional Merkur XR4Ti out of the running, as they are much, much faster cars.

2 Not having a functioning engine at the start of a race weekend has a way of making people overlook trivial things like an unfinished trophy. They can clearly be forgiven, as they have an awesome theme, a sweet old car, and awesome orange wheels on it. Also, I forgot to get a picture of the trophy, so I don't have that. But it's awesome and made of engine parts from an old VW and a Morris Minor (!).

3 They're actually incredibly awesome guys and the Team Resignation guys were enjoying the Byte Marks Escorts' success vicariously. Also, their car's graphics are fantastic!


  1. Thanks for the kind words and commentary. We will definitely (if the car doesn't blow up between now and then) do it again.

  2. Thanks for the kind words and commentary. We will definitely (if the car doesn't blow up between now and then) do it again.